Give God Time

My aunt sent me a book. Her thoughtfulness alone warmed my heart, and once I began to read the book, I immediately became that much more thankful. This book (in the short time that I've had it) has helped me through a lot of tough times. You see, I am a reader. Throughout my life, reading has served as a refuge, an escape, if you will. This book, in particular, has had an especially therapeutic effect on me. The book is called, "Choosing to See" and it was written by Mary Beth Chapman. I want to just share a small excerpt from the book, actually, the words are lyrics from a song that was written by her husband (the song playing on this page was also written by him). When I read these lyrics, it feels like a reflection of my heart...

    I don't even want to breathe right now
   All I want to do is close my eyes 
   And I don't want to open them again
   Till I'm standing on the other side

   I don't even want to be right now
   I don't want to think another thought
   And I don't want to feel this pain I feel
   But right now pain is all I've got

When I feel this way, it brings me comfort to know...

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18 NIV


There are times when my pain is so raw, so overwhelming, that I do not want to do anything - nothing at all. As the song lyrics say, "I don't even want to be". It was during one of these exact moments that I confided in a dear friend of mine. I shared some of what I was feeling with her via email. Her response, in addition to being a (cyber) shoulder for me to cry on, was for me to *Give God Time*. Give God time. That phrase stuck with me throughout the day. I found myself pondering the thought.  I realized that it's in those moments, the times when I feel overtaken by grief, that not only must I give God time, but I must also give Him my time. Thank you Friend, for that loving reminder. Since that day, I have consciously spent more time, each day, reading His word and drawing myself closer to Him. I am thankful that just as He promised, He has not left me nor has He forsaken me, instead He has encamped around me, comforting me as only He can do.

"...and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:7

Brother, I miss you, and living without you is harder than anyone could imagine, but I want you to know, I am *Giving God Time*